Polda aneb S poctivostí nejdřív pojdeš

Polda is a wacky point-and-click adventure game set in the quiet village of Lupany, which is disturbed by the sudden disappearance of two citizens. Players control the local cop, Pankrác, an unconventional and often rage-prone law enforcer whose eyes glow red during outbursts, leading him to shoot at anything from fish tanks to hobos. Over a three-day investigation, he uncovers a case strangely connected to his own family, all while featuring notable Czech voice acting and a cameo from ‘Lara Croft’s sister’. Initially rated 18+, the game’s title is a play on a Czech proverb, subverting ‘Honesty is the best policy’ to mean ‘With honesty, you will die first’.

Polda aneb S poctivostí nejdřív pojdeš: A Foundational Pillar of Czech Gaming Satire

In the annals of video game history, certain titles transcend their technical limitations to become cultural touchstones, revered not for graphical fidelity but for their unique spirit, humor, and heart. Polda aneb S poctivostí nejdřív pojdeš (often abbreviated to Polda 1) is one such game. A point-and-click adventure that emerged from the Czech Republic in the late 1990s, it is a seminal work that perfectly encapsulates a specific time, place, and sense of humor, carving out a legacy that continues to resonate with players decades later. This is not merely a review; it is an archaeological dig into a cornerstone of Central European game development.

Development History & Context: The SleepTeam Dream

The story of Polda begins not with a major corporation, but with the modest ambitions of SleepTeam Ltd, a small development group. As noted in contemporary reviews, the core team was remarkably lean, often cited as a trio of primary creators: Jaroslav Wagner (script, graphics, animation), Radek Matějka (programming), and Lubor Kopecký (music, sound, co-writing). This tiny team operated within the technological constraints of the DOS era, yet their ambition was vast.

The game was brought to market by ZIMA software, a publisher founded in 1995 that was establishing itself with titles like Mutarium and Sirius. The Czech gaming landscape of 1998 was a fascinating microcosm. The global market was dominated by big-budget American titles, but locally, developers were creating games with a distinctly Czech voice—often satirical, heavily narrative-driven, and reliant on the power of local celebrity and language. Polda was ZIMA’s foray into this adventure game niche, and it was a gamble that paid off handsomely, reportedly topping local sales charts upon release.

The development was a labor of love, a fact evident in the meticulous, hand-drawn pixel art and, most importantly, the commitment to a fully voiced script. This was a significant undertaking for a small studio, requiring the recruitment of professional sound equipment and a cast of renowned Czech comedic actors.

The Technological Constraints & Vision

Built for DOS, the game utilized a classic point-and-click interface. The vision was clear: to create a humorous, accessible adventure that prioritized character and comedy over convoluted puzzles (though it certainly had its moments of obscurity). The decision to use SVGA graphics was a commitment to quality, ensuring the game looked detailed and vibrant despite the hardware limitations. The true technological masterstroke, however, was the audio. In an era where many local games used text or minimal voice samples, Polda’s full professional dub was a statement of intent, a feature that would become its most defining and celebrated aspect.

Narrative & Thematic Deep Dive: Absurdity in Lupany

The narrative of Polda is a masterclass in Czech absurdist satire. The player assumes the role of Pankrác, the titular “polda” (cop), stationed in the sleepy, fictional village of Lupany. The premise is set up by a faux television news broadcast: two citizens have mysteriously vanished, and the investigation is entrusted to Pankrác, a man described as “everything but a proper law enforcer.”

This setup is the springboard for a three-day adventure that is less a serious detective story and more a chaotic tour through a town filled with eccentric characters. Pankrác himself is a fantastic anti-hero. He is quick to anger, prone to existential frustration with his grandmother (who is constantly knitting “o sto-šest” – like crazy), and possesses a terrifying habit of entering rage modes where his eyes glow red and he opens fire on inanimate objects, from fish tanks to unsuspecting hobos.

The plot cleverly weaves a personal thread into the mystery, hinting that the case is “connected to his family,” and even features a cameo from “Lara Croft’s sister,” a brilliant piece of tongue-in-cheek commentary on gaming trends. The title itself is a thematic thesis: a twist on the Czech equivalent of “honesty is the best policy,” subverting it to mean something like “with honesty, you’ll die sooner.” This cynicism towards authority and “the system” is a core theme, played for laughs but rooted in a very specific post-communist sensibility.

The dialogue is the game’s pulsating heart. Every interaction, from trying to reason with a pet shop owner shoving money in your face to dealing with a protected witness guarded by his wife and a pet piranha, is dripping with sarcasm, wordplay, and a uniquely Czech sense of humor. It’s a game that doesn’t just break the fourth wall; it acknowledges the absurdity of its own genre conventions.

Gameplay Mechanics & Systems: Classic Adventure, Quirky Execution

Polda operates on a standard point-and-click adventure framework. Players navigate Pankrác through pre-rendered screens, using a cursor to interact with hotspots, collect items, and engage in conversations with a vast array of quirky NPCs.

The core gameplay loop is familiar: explore every inch of an environment, pick up everything that isn’t nailed down, and try to use these items in logical (or, more often, illogical) combinations to solve puzzles and progress the story. The game is structured into three distinct days, each with its own set of objectives that gradually unravel the central mystery.

Puzzle Design: Genius and Frustration

The puzzle design is where Polda truly reveals its character. Many puzzles are clever and satisfying, rooted in the game’s internal logic and character interactions. However, the game also gleefully embraces the genre’s tendency for moon logic. Contemporary critics noted this flaw; one review from Gamebot (2023) explicitly called out a puzzle requiring the player to “deliver a package of paving stones to a witness’s windowsill using an eagle” as a “curiosity” that most players would never deduce naturally.

This design philosophy isn’t necessarily a flaw but a deliberate choice. The puzzles are often designed to be humorous in their solution, prioritizing a gag over intuitive gameplay. It creates moments of immense frustration but also unparalleled comedic payoff when the solution is finally discovered, often feeling less like a deduction and more like successfully participating in a joke.

The Rage Mechanic

A unique, albeit somewhat underutilized, systemic quirk is Pankrác’s rage mode. During these uncontrollable outbursts, the player loses control as the cop draws his weapon and fires at random objects. It’s less a mechanic to be mastered and more a character trait that reinforces his incompetent, volatile nature, adding an element of unpredictable chaos to the exploration.

World-Building, Art & Sound: The Soul of Lupany

The atmosphere of Polda is its greatest achievement, a perfect synergy of its artistic and audio components.

Visual Direction: The SVGA graphics were praised at release and remain charming today. The art style is detailed and expressive, perfectly selling the quaint-but-slightly-off-kilter vibe of Lupany. The character sprites are large and well-animated, conveying a tremendous amount of personality through their movements and expressions. From the cluttered interior of Pankrác’s home to the various shops and streets, each screen is packed with visual gags and details that reward careful observation.

Sound Design & The Legendary Dub: This is the element that elevates Polda from a good adventure game to a cultural icon. The game features a complete professional dub by some of the most famous comedic actors in the Czech Republic, including Luděk Sobota (Pankrác), Jiří Lábus, and Petr Nárožný. As multiple contemporary reviews gushed, the dub is “amazing,” “the best thing about the game,” and “skvěle nadabovaný” (brilliantly dubbed). Luděk Sobota’s performance as the perpetually exasperated Pankrác is nothing short of legendary, imbuing the character with a gruff charm that makes his incompetence endearing. The music and sound effects, primarily handled by Lubor Kopecký, are equally effective, setting the tone without ever intruding on the stellar voice work.

Together, these elements create a cohesive and immersive world that feels alive and authentically Czech. It’s a world where a photo of Václav Havel hangs in the police station and where the humor is deeply ingrained in the local culture.

Reception & Legacy: From Commercial Success to Cultural Artifact

Upon its release in 1998, Polda was a commercial success in its home market, reportedly reaching the top of sales charts. Critically, it was well-received, with reviews praising its humor, dubbing, and originality. The MobyGames aggregate score of 81% from critics reflects this positive reception, though contemporary reviews like the one from Bonusweb (2001) noted its shortcomings, calling it “quite short” and “insanely illogical.”

Its legacy, however, has far surpassed its initial sales figures. The game’s popularity spawned an entire franchise, including Awesome Cop (1999) and direct sequels numbered up to Polda 7 (2022). In a significant move that cemented its status, the game was released as freeware in late 2005 (with a Windows port following in 2007), transforming it from a commercial product into a shared cultural treasure for the Czech gaming community.

Its influence is palpable. It proved that a small, dedicated team could create a hit game with a strong local identity. It set a high bar for voice acting in Central European games and demonstrated the power of satire and character-driven storytelling. It stands alongside titles like Horké léto and Tajemství Oslího Ostrova as a foundational text of the Czech adventure game genre. The fact that fans still passionately discuss its puzzles and quote its dialogue decades later is a testament to its enduring impact.

Conclusion: An Unpolished Gem of Unmatched Charm

Polda aneb S poctivostí nejdřív pojdeš is not a perfect game. By modern standards, its puzzles can be obtuse, its length short, and its technical aspects dated. But to judge it on these metrics is to miss the point entirely.

It is a game of immense heart, character, and authenticity. It is a hilarious, cynical, and deeply affectionate parody of law enforcement, small-town life, and the adventure game genre itself. The legendary voice acting and unique atmosphere create an experience that is utterly irreplaceable and culturally significant. It is a vital artifact of Czech gaming history, a time capsule of late-90s humor, and above all, a genuinely fun and memorable adventure.

Final Verdict: Polda is an essential play for anyone interested in the history of adventure games or global game development outside the AAA sphere. It is a rough-around-the-edges, often frustrating, but ultimately brilliant gem that exemplifies the magic that can happen when a small team focuses on passion, personality, and perfect punchlines over polish. Its place in video game history is secure: a beloved, foundational pillar of Czech interactive comedy.